I’m Back!!! (with new blogging insights)

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Hi everyone! So, I had a nice week off from blogging. I needed the break to give myself some time to relax and focus on other things.

While I was away I asked myself some hard questions. Do I still enjoy blogging? Why was blogging stressing me out so much? Should I change some of my blogging habits?

I came to the conclusion that while I do still enjoy blogging, my “routine” related to blogging was wearing on me. By routine, I mean the OCD things I felt like I “had” to do every day. You see, I had gotten into a pattern where I actually spent more time trying to keep up with everyone’s else’s blogs than I spent on my own blog work!

Don’t get me wrong, I love supporting other bloggers. But I would often put unrealistic expectations on myself for how many blog posts by other people I needed to read, like, and comment on. It had become a habit and like the autistic person I am, once a habit is established, it can quickly become a taskmaster.

From now on, I’m going to try to change that habit. I will still support other bloggers (especially those who support me), but I’m not going to assign myself quotas! Honestly, some people I supported regularly I never hear from anyway lol. I’m ok with that, but why stress myself out for people I don’t even really communicate with?

Maybe you all can give me your insights and methods for supporting others. Do you mainly try to return comments/likes? Do you try to keep up with too many other bloggers like I was doing?

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Published by

marandarussell

Hi! I am an artist, author, and blogger who also happens to have Asperger’s Syndrome. I have won several awards and honors for my writings and artwork. I suffer from a few severe mental illness and chronic pain conditions (Depression, Anxiety, PTSD, Fibromyalgia, CFS/ME, Ehlers Danlos, Degenerative Disc Disease, etc.), which greatly affects my life and makes me want to advocate for others going through similar things. Other interests of mine include reading, writing, drawing, watching cartoons and movies, collecting toys, hanging out with my family, and annoying my 3 cats.

42 thoughts on “I’m Back!!! (with new blogging insights)”

  1. Hi Maranda, glad you are back. I understand completely what you are saying about wearing yourself out with trying to keep up with everything. It is very ease to get into this habit of checking, updating , posting etc and finally end your day feeling completely drained. A good balance is necessary and sometimes totally switching off can be very beneficial.

    I find that blogging less often leads to more quality posts and also gives me more time to work on my art (which is the topic of my blog anyway!!)

    Looking forward to your next posts.
    Stay safe,
    Iasonas

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  2. I have definitely gotten drawn into trying to keep up with too many bloggers. I’ve always liked working my way through my WP Reader feed just because it’s convenient, but I’ve gotten better at skipping over more posts when I feel like I don’t have a lot of time, and instead just focusing on the people that I interact with regularly. But it always kind of feels like a work in progress to get right balance.

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    1. Yeah, it is. The problem with me is that routine really can become an obsession and once in a while I need to objectively look at what I’m doing and if it still serves me or helps matters. I’m going to try to do like you said and focus more on the blogs and bloggers that interact more with me.

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  4. Wow, very self-aware to see your obsessions and how they cause you stress. We admire your willingness to reduce your suffering

    We do not have predictable stamina, so we only read, write, and respond when we can

    Nonviolent Communication suggests two questions about the present: (1) what is alive in us (and others) right now? (2) What would make life more wonderful?

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  5. I don’t have any strict routine. I try to write once a week but I mainly follow my heart. If I have nothing worth writing about, then I don’t. I do try to respond to every comment but it is not always possible. Obviously it all depends on how many comments you get! Just do what you enjoy!

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  6. I’m not always the best “folloer,” but I have difficulty reading and if posts are too long I generally skim them rather than read the entire post because I simply can’t sight read. That said, I don’t like getting email notifications, I have far too many things hitting my inbox as it is. However, I do set new posts to send me notifications. I find it far easier and I can “like” or reply from the notifications drop-down. I was wondering where you were, hoping nothing bad had happened. It’s good to see you’re still with us.

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  8. I think it is very wise of you to not put limits and quotas on yourself.
    Personally, I try to write my own posts first and then go over to the reader to read those that I follow.

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  9. Oooh this is a very good question. I always respond to people who take the trouble of commenting on my posts and slowly I’ve developed a lovely friendship with some of them. People do come and go and that’s fine with me … I think we all need a bit of a break sometimes. I found it hard to get back into the momentum of writing for a bit and I always worry too much about … everything! But it’s lovely that you’re back and it sounds like you’ve got it sorted! Katie

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  10. I post when I feel like it. But I do have a few regular set days posting. I always like to respond to comments left on my blog.

    When visiting other blogs, these will be from tje WordPress reader. I don’t follow more than 200 blogs. But I think I have less than this due to some blogs not being active.
    I don’t give myself a hard time of commenting on every blog post. Sometimes it may just be a like. But the ones I find I have quite a rapport with, I like to make sure I read theirs and comnent.

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    1. ♥♥♥ I try to go through once in a while and unfollow blogs that have been inactive for 6 months or more, but even with doing that, I find it hard to keep my number of blogs followed below 200. Maybe I should work on that. 200 is a good number. It is hard to keep up with too many.

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      1. I find no more than 200 is much easier to handle. One time my count was I think 500 and there was no way I could keep up with that.
        I do like you, check the blogs I follow now and again and if I find any that have not posted 6 months or more, I unfollow.

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  11. You don’t have to be autistic to have this problem. It crops up for me and many others. That feeling of trying to do all and be all in the blogging world. It is impossible. You were wise to step back for reflection. I think people do different things at different times. I have a lot of followers, but so many of them are just looking to sell something. I focus on blogs that really interest me and/or are written by people with whom I make a connection. Some are book reviewers like me, but others are not. They are just positive and interesting people. When I get overwhelmed, I have learned to delete emails telling me about posts and not feel guilty about it. I have gotten pretty good at knowing at a glance if I can just discard or if I will be missing out. In most cases that person will have written another post by the end of that day or week and I will have another opportunity to connect and support. I wish you well as you work towards finding what is right for you,,,for now.

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  13. Your post brings up a familiar problem that I have as well in setting myself rules and routines and then they turn the tables on me and manage me. I come from a similar place as you and it’s hard to have insight into when things get out of hand ( for me, anyway). My method is to answer each comment but at the level the commenter engaged me – and stay with only a couple of sentences. ( not this time I guess…) I follow people who I think I’d enjoy speaking to if I could personally meet them, so not just a casual interest. I like your perspective on life and I think you’re a wonderful writer. I applaud you for how reflective you are and I look forward to what you have to say. Glad you’re back.

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  14. I am all about being that weirdo who forgets a blog exists until WordPress algorithm suddenly shows me a post again and I go and read (and like) a bunch of posts in a row that only in hindsight do I realize represent two months of normal posting!

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  15. I will not lie but it can be exhausting to read through the several posts each day and they keep updating! I find it rather bad to not read or like or comment but I guess I should limit myself too.

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  16. Well done for stepping away and being assertive in easing things up. This is the part I keep getting stuck on. I can spend hours a day reading and commenting on other blogs because I want to support other bloggers, but I have so little time in any day where I’m well enough to do anything and I can never catch up, then of course I have no time for anything else. It does get stressful but I’m not sure how to not fall into the trap because I get an itch if I haven’t gone through the whole lot, working my way down the reader and then sharing on social media and commenting… It’s finding a balance without feeling the guilt.
    Try to do what works for you without as much pressure or putting expectations and quotas, as you say, on yourself.
    Caz xx

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  17. That’s an important realization. I like it!

    Constraints are a useful tool.
    Sometimes you recognize what constraints would be useful only after making a few mistakes.
    Awareness is the vital first step.

    Nicely written and concise post. Thank you for sharing! (:

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  18. I’ve been at it for a little over a year now and the fascination is just as new as when I began.

    I think my crime is writing for others, trying to write what I think they will like, when I should be honest with my thoughts.

    I still feel I should consider others in my blog, which I do. But I have to remember to be true to myself because my readers want to hear/read me for who I am, not who I’m trying to be for others.

    Those who follow me know me for laughs and education. In my heart, I know I’m not letting anyone down.

    Thank you for your article. I’ll follow along to learn more about you!

    Liked by 1 person

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      1. I’m trying to build my following, but since I don’t have a specific area of focus, I thought it best to just keep it generally entertaining.

        They’ll come, eventually!

        Liked by 1 person

  19. I wish there was an answer to this! Or if there is, I obviously haven’t learned it yet. In my case I treat it like my home, clean enough to be healthy, untidy enough to be happy. So it’s about finding the right balance and knowing that no two days are the same!

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