My Uncle Passed Away

My uncle did pass away, so tomorrow we are heading for Indiana for the viewing, and then the funeral is on Saturday, at the church he pastored for many years. Feeling sad about it all. I’ve glad he isn’t in pain and won’t suffer anymore, but I’ll miss him. The whole week has felt rather dark and overshadowed by the loss, so my mental health has been struggling a bit. I’m trying to make sure to do fun things and fill my life with activity so I don’t get pulled down too far into a depression, but it has been rough.

When you have experienced times of loss and grief, how do you cope? Do you have any specific suggestions that help you keep a positive frame of mind through the sadness? I am allowing myself to feel the sadness, but I don’t want to get swept away by it too much and end up in a dark depression, as that has definitely happened in the past when I experienced the loss of loved ones.

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Hi! I am an artist, author, and blogger who also happens to have Asperger’s Syndrome. I have won several awards and honors for my writings and artwork. I suffer from a few severe mental illness and chronic pain conditions (Depression, Anxiety, PTSD, Fibromyalgia, CFS/ME, Ehlers Danlos, Degenerative Disc Disease, etc.), which greatly affects my life and makes me want to advocate for others going through similar things. Other interests of mine include reading, writing, drawing, watching cartoons and movies, collecting toys, hanging out with my family, and annoying my 3 cats.

38 thoughts on “My Uncle Passed Away”

  1. I am terribly sorry for your loss. I may not be qualified enough to give you advice, but I think most importantly you need to give yourself time to grieve, and allow yourself to properly grieve. Everyone grieves in their own way. Take time to yourself if you need to. Maybe after the funeral consider taking a trip somewhere, doesn’t have to be anywhere far. Maybe even just a day trip. Do things that you enjoy. Maybe even channel your feelings into your writing and your hobbies. You will be okay ❤️

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Good advice ♥ My husband and I are planning on taking a trip up to Buffalo NY over spring break if things work out well. I think that would definitely be a good thing, but that isn’t until the end of March if I remember right. Not too far away though.

      Liked by 2 people

  2. So sorry for your loss.

    I have been affected by grief differently over the years, but based on the last one that affected me greatly, is just keeping their memory alive.
    Remembering to live for you, like they would have done for themselves.
    Remembering all those good times you had.
    And taking each day as it comes.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Maranda, leaving my husband’s memorial service, I had a transcendent, blissful feeling that coexisted with the devastating loss and the prospect of having two children to raise alone. In his short life, he had helped so many people and accomplished so much. The years of pain and struggle were over, and he left behind a loving legacy and example.

        Your uncle lived a life of service to others as a pastor. This is a very sad occasion for those who loved him and will miss him. It is a time to grieve and comfort each other. Then it will be time to remember him fondly and try to honor his example by living your best life.

        I hope you and your husband find rest and renewal on your spring break trip.

        Take care. ❤

        Liked by 1 person

  3. I don’t know if it’s issues with object permanence, but I have a hard time clearly differentiating in my head between not here (but living) and not here (but dead). So either way I tend to think about the goodness that’s been associated with the person all along.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Oh Maranda, I’m so sorry. It’s never a good time to lose a loved one but I imagine it’s all the more difficult during the pandemic with all the restrictions. I hope you can grieve as you need. I understand wanting to feel the sadness but not get swept up too badly in it. I can’t offer any great bits of advice other than that I’ve found reliance on distractions helpful, built in throughout the day even just for 10-20 minutes here and there. Sending hugs and lots of love to you & your family. Have a safe trip up to Indiana. 🌹

    Caz xx

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Sending you my deepest condolences dear. May you and your family find peace and closure. Grieving is an ongoing cycle that asks us to be patient with ourselves.. Please take care of your gentle spirit. You are very loved❤

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I have actually found that ‘talking’ to my loved one – conversations inside my head – helps me cope with the sadness. In those ‘conversations’, I can feel as though I can share a memory that my loved one and I had that was special to us, and I’ve also used them to say “I’m sorry” for things I did or didn’t do while the person was living. I think it’s my way of writing my own closure to the loss.

    Be patient with yourself and don’t be afraid to feel what you feel. Grieving never gets easier with practice, but as long as you do it in your time and in a way that feels safe to you, you can accomplish it.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I’m so very sorry for your loss. I’ve lost parents, six siblings, grandparents, and multiple aunts, uncles and cousins over the years, and it never gets easier. Grief is very personal and affects everyone differently. Take your time and grieve, but don’t forget to take care of yourself. I have found that involving myself in my crafts helps a lot. I’ve also found that every time I start feeling sad, I go down memory lane and think of some of the very good times I had with the person I lost. I also have to keep telling myself that they are in a better place and someday I’ll be with them again. I hope this helps. You’ll get through this. Sending hugs and prayers for comfort.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I am sorry for your loss. I got knocked off my blog by injuries and a rising tally of lost loved ones.
    All I have is, “Aren’t we lucky we had them?” Eventually they can be happy/sad tears.

    Liked by 1 person

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