One Minute Homeless Monologue – Theater Creative Writing

Here is another creative writing monologue. This one from the POV of a homeless person. BTW, these monologues are NOT about me personally! If you use this monologue for an acting exercise, Tiktok or YouTube video, etc, let me know! I would be thrilled to know these are being used!

“Homeless”

Yeah, I’m an old, homeless bum, what of it? (beat) You gonna throw that bag of old McDonald’s fries at me? Like I’ve not been hit by worse. The food bits don’t bother me near as much as the drinks, especially the milky ones. Those turn sour in the sun pretty quick out here, and it isn’t exactly like I have a spare clean set of clothes to slip into.

I guess I can comfort myself with the fact that the worse I smell, the more you all suffer as well if you have to be around me. If so, I hope you are standing downwind.

Yeah, that’s my dog. (beat) What do you mean homeless people shouldn’t own dogs? Maybe heartless assholes like you shouldn’t own dogs! (beat) Oh, you’re a cat kind of guy? Figures. It actually explains a lot.