Art Show Anxiety – Past Wins, Future Failures? Am I Good Enough?

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Ok, so this past year I placed and won an award in a pretty prestigious art competition. One of those fancy ones where you have to pay hundreds of dollars to even go to the art show and sale, and the auction bids can get pretty crazy. It was for charity though, so I didn’t mind the high price stuff related to it. This was definitely the most “high-brow” art show I have been a part of.

Now they have announced that the first year’s show was such a success that they are doing the competition for 2020 too. I plan to enter and am excited about it, but also really nervous and filled with self doubt. I keep feeling like if I don’t place at all next year or at least place as high as I did this year that I will somehow be failing.

I tell myself this is ridiculous. There are so many talented artists out there and if I don’t place again it won’t mean that I am less talented, it will only mean that they preferred someone else’s take on the contest subject matter. Also, I want other artists to feel the happiness I felt when I found out I had been selected as a winner. I don’t want to be selfish.

I know deep down this is probably about my perfectionistic streak and low self-esteem. Part of me feels like it was just a lucky fluke to be recognized by the “elite” art world at all. I wish I could not put this unnecessary pressure on myself. I know it isn’t healthy or helpful. Any suggestions for how to let go of the fear of failure?

A Few Favorite Photos From My Birthday Trip

My husband and I had a great time on my birthday trip, although I am exhausted and extremely sore now! It will probably take at least a week for me to recuperate physically, but it was worth it! Here are a few of my favorite photos from the trip:

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Rainy days are still beautiful in Kentucky.
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Just a girl walking along an autumn road…
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A reminder that even while we are on vacation, social issues abound. House the Homeless.
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Two aging sweethearts lol.
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Watching the leaves fall into the river.
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Dance as if no one is watching.
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This speaks to my Irish soul.
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Art and nature combine.

 

A Couple Weird Drawings

Today was a busy day, so I am posting kind of late. I figured I would just share a couple fun, slightly weird drawings I did not too long ago. The first was inspired by a Youtuber I sometimes listen to and the other picture was inspired by the unicorn from Despicable Me. Both are obviously abstract and not directly representative of the subjects that inspired them lol:

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(Check out my art for sale on my Ebay store!)