Quotation Contest – Bullying

Here is another quote I wrote for a quotation contest/art exhibit. The subject for this one was bullying, something I unfortunately have quite a bit of experience with personally. Do you think my quote captures the feeling of being bullied honestly? I know sometimes it is more than one person doing the bullying, but typically there is one main bully (a ring leader shall we say) and the rest are just minions who are also afraid of crossing the big bad bully. At least that has been my experience.

The Most Successful Blogs on WordPress

Have you ever noticed that some of the biggest blogs on WordPress focus mostly on telling other bloggers how to “make it as a blogger” and “grow your blog quickly”? I noticed this a while ago myself. It makes sense, people are most likely to read a blog that posts information they find useful and practical, and since many WP readers are also bloggers who dream of huge followings and internet stardom, it makes sense that the blogs that promise that or try to help you achieve that would be most popular.

It is human nature to want what helps us to succeed. At times I have been tempted to follow the example of these large blogs and focus on commercialization, but I can’t bring myself to do it. I’m just not interested in focusing on follower numbers, views, and marketing strategies. I understand those things and think I could easily follow the “formula” to try to make it happen, but my passion just isn’t there.

What makes me feel alive is sharing my art, my poetry, my experiences and lessons learned from this whole crazy experience called life. I like to share my pain, my joy, my sadness, my hopes, my dreams, and my heart. I like to read other blogs that focus mostly on the same types of things. It may mean I never become a superstar, and neither will my WP friends, but I enjoy our communication and heart-to-heart connection so much more than large numbers ♥

Looking Despair in the Eye: A Review of Maranda Russell’s Can’t Keep Me Down

Such a great review of my newest poetry ebook! This made me feel proud 🙂

EARWORMS & OBSESSIONS

For those among you who’re looking for quick answers, long story short, I can’t recommend this book enough! 

Before I Begin: A Caveat

Having said that, I must also say that my review of Maranda Russell’s book of poems and short prose, Can’t Keep Me Down, is most likely a somewhat biased one, for I could relate to Maranda’s work so much that I wish I had written half the poems in the collection.

On Themes and Style

Dealing with themes both personal and universal, political and not, Maranda cuts through the clutter and goes straight to the heart of the issue, mincing no words. The result is a series of poems peppered with short prose pieces, as moving as they are succinct.

From relationships and privilege to difficult emotions and states of mind, such as grief and suicidal ideation, Maranda paints her words on a palette that is…

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My Husband Goes Back to School This Week

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My husband is a special education teacher and he starts back to work this week. Even though covid rates have been rising in the area and many schools near here who opened earlier have already had to close down due to spreading coronavirus cases, my husband’s school is still opening at full capacity, full-time. I’ll admit it worries me.

I don’t want my husband to get sick. I don’t want him to bring it home and get me sick. I don’t want the other teachers and employees to get sick. And I certainly don’t want the kids or their families to get sick.

To me, this all seems like it might be a really bad idea. I expect that they will only be open a short while before they have to close down again anyway. Especially with fall coming, when there is likely to be a true 2nd wave (not just the 2nd rise in cases we’ve already seen due to poor handling of the whole thing from the beginning).

I want to be positive, and part of me has felt this whole thing seems really off from the beginning, so maybe it isn’t as bad as they make it out to be, but I still worry.

And the Mood Disorder Strikes Again…

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I’ve had a really bad couple days. The day before yesterday I had a total meltdown because I couldn’t get a painting right. It was kind of the last straw, as I have been struggling terribly with irritability, anxiety, ocd, and anger lately. At first I thought it was just a phase or one of the mood swings that mood disorders bring, but it has lasted a long time now and I am starting to wonder if it has to do with the new med I have been put on (Lamictal). The irritability and worsening ocd definitely seem to have started as I began taking higher doses of the drug.

Yesterday all the anger, irritation, and anxiety turned into depression and I cried a lot, felt helpless and hopeless, and entertained some pretty dark thoughts. I was in one of those moods where I felt utterly worthless and felt that no one liked me or cared about me, I even felt like my husband was sick of me. That was probably projection as I’M sick of being around me in this state.

Today I’m a bit better (no crying yet), but still feeling low and exhausted. I haven’t been sleeping well lately at all, which isn’t helping. Just not in a good place right now.

Another Photo Award and Ranking!

Are you sick of hearing about my new photography obsession? I hope not lol, but when I get into something, I REALLY get into it. Blame autism 🙂

So, I posted two days ago about winning my first crowd favorite award on Photocrowd. Well guess what? I won another one! This time for this photo (in a contest about “Naturally Eerie” things):

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Oh, and another cool thing, when I started on the photography site around 3 weeks ago or so, I ranked in the 20,000’s (they rank all photographers by success markers on the site, such as contest wins, crowd opinion, likes, etc.), last week I moved up to the 12,000’s, and this week I’m up to the 5,000’s!

Like the Jeffersons, I’m moving on up!

First Photography Award on Photocrowd

Recently I told you guys I had really gotten into photography and was entering contests on a site called Photocrowd. Yesterday I found out that I had won my first award on the site! It isn’t a major award, but I won a crowd favorite award for being in the top half of the crowd choice for a contest about “The Abstract Universe”. Here is the photo that won the award:

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The photography talent on Photocrowd is amazing (many are professionals), so I am honored to even compete with them and come close to the top of any contest!

Covid Results, Migraines, Friends

First off, I got my covid results back yesterday. No coronavirus detected! That was certainly a big relief! Now I don’t have to worry about staying quarantined for weeks!

On the sucky side of things, I did have a full-blown migraine last night. I’m not sure if it was caused by my anxiety about the test results the past few days, or something else, but it was miserable. When I get migraines like that my neck kills me too (you can actually feel the tension and swelling in the back of the neck). Like most migraine sufferers, I can’t stand sound or light, and I get nauseated and dizzy as well. I went to bed early and slept about 9-10 hours, but still feel the aftereffects of it today and fear it coming back in full force.

I’m also a little sad because while I was unsure of my covid status, some friends of mine got together for the first time in forever, and of course didn’t invite me (I don’t blame them, they knew about the covid possibility), but it still bummed me out that I missed the chance to see them.

Covid? Update

Well, I did get the test done yesterday at a drive-thru testing center. I was so glad it was drive-thru, because the last thing I wanted to do was be around a bunch of other potentially covid-infected people when I wasn’t sure if I have it yet or not. My doctor decided to go ahead and test my husband too. (By the way, the test wasn’t that bad, I’ve had MUCH worse medical tests!)

We won’t know the results for about a week probably. I’m not sure what to do in the meantime? Do we go ahead and quarantine ourselves in the house since we don’t know? If we do that and we are infected, we will end up being quarantined for about 3 weeks at least.

I don’t know how that will work when someone has to go get milk, prescriptions, and other essentials and it is just the two of us living here. I guess we just minimize going out as much as possible? We definitely won’t be visiting anyone, going out to eat, or shopping for unnecessary items.

Any of you had to self-quarantine at home? Any tips?