Jasper
By: Maranda Russell
Stone
formed from drops
of Christ’s blood,
the martyr’s gem
from legends of old –
jasper
stained with red flecks,
forever falling
from the foot of the cross.
beliefs
Poetry: Church Abuse
Church Abuse
By: Maranda Russell
The lace unravels.
The smaller holes
become bigger tears
as the candle wax
hardens on the soft,
satin cloth.
Prayers,
and pleas
and petitions
abound,
but the altar
lies irrevocably
ruined.
What is Your Great Work?
Recently I was reading a book about glamour magic. I read a lot of books about paganism and mystical spiritual paths, because even though I consider myself an agnostic, I also believe there are many, many things we don’t understand and I enjoy delving into the mysteries and deeper meanings found in spirituality and mythology.
Overall, the book was a bit of a letdown, it seemed fairly shallow in some ways, but I guess I should have guessed that since glamour magic itself is generally about surface level changes. However, there was one meditative exercise in the book that I did find meaningful. This part of the book emphasized the importance of figuring out what your great work will be.
As the book went on to explain, in order to get anywhere in life, you have to know what you are aiming for. You have to know what is most important to you in terms of achievement and meaning. You have to figure out where your energy, passion, and hard work should be directed. So, I meditated on this subject for a while and here are the three things I came up with that I currently would consider my own “great work” in this life:
- My writing/blog. Guess what? You guys are all a BIG part of my great work! I write because my soul cries out to share my experiences, feelings, hopes, and dreams. Having people who actually want to read about those things is truly a magical gift in itself!
- My art. I often feel insecure in my artistic abilities. I feel like there are so many artists out there that are far more talented and definitely better trained than myself, but I LOVE art and sometimes I genuinely love the stuff I make. My art may not be top of the line, but I do think many of my creations are unique artworks that only I could make.
- Advocating for others like me. This kind of ties into #1 and #2, since I often use my art and my writing to advocate for others who have autism, mental illness, or chronic pain/illness. People like me are often marginalized, ignored, looked down upon, and mistreated. I want to help stop that. I want to help the world to become a kinder, more empathetic place for those who struggle.
Now that I have shared my own great works in life, why don’t you spend a little time figuring out your own? You can pick just one, or you can have several like I did. Think deeply about it and question your purpose in life. If you would like to share what you come up with in the comments on this post, I would love to hear it!
New ACEO Artwork Series: Ancient Symbols
Recently I decided to combine my love for art and ancient symbology into a new series of ACEO art trading cards. I have several books about signs, symbols, and sigils and plan to make a variety of artworks celebrating my love for these mysterious and intriguing ancient forms of wisdom.
So far, I have made four of these cards, two of them inspired by Shinto symbols and two inspired by ancient Egyptian cartouches (a series of symbols that represents deities or royalty).
The first Shinto symbol is a version of the Good Luck Crane:
I also did a version of the Shinto Tortoise of Longevity:
As for the Egyptian cartouches, the first represents Thothmes III:
And the 2nd represents Hatshepset:
Please let me know what you guys think of this new series. I hope you like it. You can find these artworks and more for sale on my Ebay store, so check it out!
Never Argue with Ignorance!
I made this little drawing to remind myself to not put too much effort and energy into trying to argue with people who are willfully ignorant and are unwilling to see or hear any evidence or opinion other than their own. Far too many times (especially on Facebook), I have been drawn into pointless, never-ending arguments that boil down to people who absolutely refuse to even consider any facts or studies that do not support their preconceived notions.
Of course, I am not saying that I can never be ignorant. Just yesterday I had someone correct me on a misconception I had about Roe vs. Wade, and I was thankful that they told me something that I hadn’t known, because now I feel that I have a better overall concept of the subject. This desire to be better informed makes me confused when people make it clear that they have no wish to be informed by facts at all.
This drawing is currently for sale on my Ebay store, so if you like it, check it out!
Short Poetry – Doubt Lingers
I love short poetry, it is actually my favorite kind of poetry. There is something magical about being able to express a truth, or paint a vivid image, with only a few words. So, when I woke up today with these few lines echoing in my head, I had to write them down and share:
“From the first light
of the gods,
till the last tide
of the moon,
doubt lingers…”
(Image from Pixabay)
Late Night, Can’t Sleep Thoughts
The following is a journal entry of random thoughts and feelings I wrote down one night when I couldn’t sleep. As you can probably tell, I wasn’t in the best mood when I wrote it:
“Lately I’ve been deeply struggling with so many dark thoughts. Not necessarily dark thoughts about myself, but about the world and humanity in general.
I feel like I have lost all sense of personal ethics and could do anything if pushed far enough. Lie. Steal. Kill. Betray. I don’t feel guilty about this though, because I think it is a universal human weakness. I’m not sure that ethics and morality even exist once you push a human being past rational thought.
One thought resounds through my consciousness, that much of humanity isn’t worth the breath that is wasted on them. The twisted side of me wants to see the world burn, even if I burn with it. I am often confronted with the very real possibility that the world would be better off if humans went extinct.”
*By the way, if you are struggling with feelings like these, BetterHelp offers some great advice about online therapy options!
I am an Emotional Writer
I am an emotional writer. I write from whatever my current point of view and mood dictates. Often my writing may be entirely contradictory or may not even represent my general consensus on a given subject, but is instead a snapshot of a moment in time.
Reading through my journal entries and blog posts may appear to be a debate between various personalities – and in a sense, perhaps it is. No, I do not suffer from some sort of multiple personality disorder, but I use writing to discover and decipher my own jumbled thoughts and feelings. When I start writing, I often don’t know exactly where it is going to go, what the end result will be, or what I will learn along the way, but that is part of the magic of the creative process.
Please keep in mind when reading this blog, that what is being presented is often unfiltered, barely edited, stream-of-consciousness prose that represents only a momentary glimpse of my overall experience of life. If you dislike what I write today, stick around, because you just might love what I write tomorrow!
What I Believe, Do Not Believe, and Am Unsure About
Like many others with Aspergers and OCD traits, I enjoy making lists and organizing my thoughts in a linear fashion on paper. While flipping through an old notebook, I found the following lists of “What I Believe”, “What I Do Not Believe”, and “What I Am Unsure Of”, and thought I would share it just for fun. Since I am not religious anymore, I made this list to try to figure out and pinpoint what I personally believe or no longer believe.
What I Believe
- There is probably some kind of all-encompassing spirit or energy in the universe. Whether that energy is conscious and/or aware can be argued.
- There is an inter-connectedness of all things.
- I believe in the power and goodness of love, kindness, and forgiveness.
- I believe in the power and strength of nature.
What I Do Not Believe
- Any form of religious dogma. It is ALL man-made.
- I do not believe that any human or religion has all the answers, no matter how much they think they do.
- I do not believe in eternal punishment or “hell”.
- I do not believe that everyone needs to or should follow the same path.
What I Am Unsure Of
- Are there any Gods or Goddesses in any form?
- Is there an afterlife? Are ghosts, hauntings, or reincarnation real?
- Are there other “realms”? For example, do fairies, aliens, alternate realities, mythical monsters, etc. exist in this current reality or any other?
- Is there such a thing as a personal soul? If so, do only humans have them, or all living beings? Can a non-organic being (like Artificial Intelligence) have or develop a “soul”?
Maranda Russell 