Poured Out
By: Maranda Russell
Why do I feel like
my poetry sucks?
I try to write,
only to find myself
empty,
poured out like milk
and starting to
curdle.
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creative process
Who Do I Want to Be as an Artist?
Today I was inspired by a blog post from Judith over at Artistcoveries, in which she asks the question – Who do I want to be as an artist? I love thinking about stuff like this, so I wrote the question down in my journal and brainstormed my own answers. Here is what I came up with:
Who do I want to be as an artist?
- Unafraid to experiment
- Unafraid to offend
- Unafraid of mockery
- Confident in my creative abilities
- Willing to share the good, the bad, and the ugly of my art
- Use the materials I love, not feeling forced to use what is considered artistically “professional”
- Confident enough to charge what my art is worth (probably one of the hardest parts of being an artist in my opinion)
- I want to be loved and respected by other artists and art lovers, especially those in the autism, bipolar, and outsider art worlds
- I want to create what I like
- Overcome my fear of doing in-person art events (currently hindered by my crippling social anxiety)
- Monetarily successful enough to rely on my art for my general income
Do you relate to any of these wishes? Who do you want to be as an artist?
New Original Art Drawings!
I’m still recuperating from my wisdom teeth surgery, but thought I would share a few recent drawings. I hope you like them:
You can find these artworks and others for sale at my Ebay store.
Rick and Morty Fan Art
Any Rick and Morty fans out there? I’ve watched the tv show whenever I happen to catch it on Cartoon Network and enjoy the weird sense of humor, goofy characters, and the alternate dimensions sci-fi feel of it. Not too long ago I was looking for something fun and simple to draw and decided to do my own abstract version of Rick:
What do you guys think? Did I catch his vibe with the art or can you even tell it is supposed to be him? This drawing did already sell, so I guess someone liked it at least!
Walking Towards Depression
I recently sold this oil pastel drawing shown above, but I wanted to share it because it is one of my favorite pieces I have done recently. If you can’t tell, the image is of a person and a little dog walking through a rainbow world (which represent happiness and life), but ahead of them lies the darkness of depression and they either don’t see it coming, or are impelled to continue walking, perhaps against their own will.
As someone who struggles with bipolar type 2 and chronic severe depressive episodes, this is clearly a personal feeling conjured into a visual image. I thought I would share though, because I bet some of you can relate to it too.
Helpful Tips for Fellow Depression & Chronic Pain Sufferers
Hello everyone! Lately I have implemented a few things into my life that I do feel are helping my depression and chronic pain symptoms, at least to an extent. No, I am not cured, and I still have some really bad days, but I feel like these small changes have been for the better, so I wanted to share:
- My psychiatrist has been trying to get me to take Omega-3 supplements for months now, and I finally decided to make sure I actually take them on a regular basis. I have been trying to take 2 supplement pills a day, one in the morning and one at night. It is supposed to be really good for depression and inflammation, so it is worth a try. I don’t like the taste or how huge the pills are to swallow, but I am making it work anyways.
- I have read multiple places that people with fibromyalgia are almost always lacking in Magnesium when tested, so I started taking a daily supplement of that as well. I do think it has lessened the severity of the body aches and cramps I experience on a daily basis. I also started taking a Vitamin C supplement in hopes it will help boost my immune system and prevent some of the chronic ear infections I have. I am trying to eat healthier, more natural foods too.
- I have started practicing mediation on a regular basis again. I try to take at least a few minutes most days to meditate, focus on positivity, and allow the spiritual side of myself to shine. My husband and I have also been attending a once-a-week meditation group when we are able to. Having that time to connect with others on their own spiritual paths has been helpful. They all seem to be very open-minded and open-hearted individuals, which are the kind of people I would like to have in my life more.
- Lately I have renewed my dedication to my own creative process and have felt inspired to create art again, something I have definitely been missing in my life. I simply feel better when I can create beautiful or unusual artwork, even if others don’t always understand it. Honestly, I create for ME. Yes, I sell my artwork and it fills my heart with joy to know that others appreciate and collect my efforts, but deep down, I create simply because I need to express myself.
- Make it a priority to spend time with nature. Whether it is going to a park, hiking through the woods, sitting on a swing outside your own front door, or bringing plants, animals (pets), crystals, and other natural objects into your home, reconnecting with nature always seems to be healing and comforting for myself. Maybe it will be so for you as well.
Poetic Art #3 – We All Fall Down
I’m not feeling too well right now due to one of my wisdom teeth hurting pretty bad, but I wanted to share another of my recent art/poetry drawings. Lately I’ve had an uptick of sales on my art and I truly appreciate it! Thank you so much to all those who support me that way!
“I once had a name,
had a home, had a life.
But the winds swept thru
like they always do,
and I lost it all
at that trumpet call.
And their voices sound,
spinning round and round,
till we all fall down.”
You can find this drawing and other artworks of mine for sale at my Ebay store!
New Original Art Drawings! Feeling Creative Again!
I’ve been feeling artistic and creative again lately, which is an awesome feeling. Honestly, when I don’t feel creative at all, I don’t feel like myself. That in itself can add to my depression and anxiety. Sometimes I wonder if some of the meds I take don’t affect my creative output. It is a common belief among many artists that antidepressants and other mental health medications can dim or even entirely restrict the creative impulse. I’m not sure if that is entirely true, but I do feel there is at least a grain of truth in it. Perhaps, because anything that numbs you or tries to restrict emotions (even bad ones) can’t help but dull the creative spirit, which relies so much on the ability to feel deeply and be sensitive.
Anyhow, last night I made a couple new drawings and thought I would share them! There’s no particular theme with these two, I just went with whatever came out.
If you like my artwork, check out my Ebay store to see what I have for sale!
Feeling Like Shit Art
I’ve been feeling like shit for a few days now (honestly, it has been longer than that, but the last few days were especially bad). So, my creative side has definitely been expressing that. I decided to make a couple ACEO sticker collages, and as you can see below, my mood comes across loud and clear with my black graffiti scrawls on the colorful backgrounds. I wouldn’t exactly call it “good art”, but it is expressive.
