Tag: despair

  • My World Has Crashed

    I’m normally brutally honest with you guys, but sometimes that is hard when someone else’s privacy and reputation is involved, but I am deeply hurting today and must share that much at least. I feel like my entire world has been turned upside down in less than a day’s worth of time. I found out […]

  • Poetry – Nihilism in 3 Acts

    Act 1. I don’t know if being alive matters. Act 2. I don’t know if this world matters. Act 3. I don’t know if me being alive in this world matters. 

  • In Pain, Depressed, and Isolated

    Sorry I haven’t written in a few days. I threw my back/neck out again and it has been bad. Probably the worst it has ever been. I have been constantly downing pain killers and muscle relaxers and still no change. Usually the worst only lasts a day or two during these flareups, but now I’m […]

  • Depression Spirits ACEO Drawing

    This ACEO oil pastel drawing pretty much sums up how I’m feeling. Still struggling with the depression spirits today: Find this artwork and more for sale on my Ebay store.

  • Twittering Tales #125 – Empty Bed

    Here is the photo prompt and my entry for this week’s Twittering Tales writing challenge hosted by Kat Myrman: Olivia sat on the edge of her daughter’s unmade bed. She ran her fingers over the ridges and bulges of the white blankets. She leaned down to sniff the fluffy pillow at the head of the […]

  • Poetry: Spectre of Depression

    I wish you could see the spectre of depression haunting my days… dragging his knuckles through the miry muck and leaving a trail of icy numbness behind. (Poetry by Maranda Russell, marandarussell.com)

  • Does Any of It Matter?

    Do you ever wonder if it all matters? I sure do. I try to be positive most of the time when I think about the things I do and whether they make a difference, but when I get depressed, the voices of doubt tend to get louder. They say some pretty mean things: Are you […]

  • Not in a Good Place Right Now

    I’m not in a good place right now. I wish I was, but I’m not. For the past couple months, I have been struggling off and on with what almost feels like a new low level of depression. Half the time I can’t stop crying, and half the time I feel almost absolutely nothing. I […]

  • Late Night, Can’t Sleep Thoughts

    The following is a journal entry of random thoughts and feelings I wrote down one night when I couldn’t sleep. As you can probably tell, I wasn’t in the best mood when I wrote it: “Lately I’ve been deeply struggling with so many dark thoughts. Not necessarily dark thoughts about myself, but about the world […]

  • PTSD and After Effects of Abusive Relationships

    A couple nights ago I was feeling so confused and conflicted inside that I started to feel a little bit claustrophobic. Some of you may not understand that feeling if you’ve never had it yourself, but it is something I have experienced more than once when the emotional and rational parts of my brain just […]