Pony Gods

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Pony Gods
Written By: Maranda Russell

I pray to the Pony Gods.
I don’t know if they listen,
or even if they care,
but sometimes
they do seem to answer.

Why the Pony Gods?
Why not?

I figure the Pony Gods
have just as much a chance
of being good –
or being real
as the human ones.

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Fighting Fear

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“Fighting Back from the Inside” drawing by Maranda Russell

Fighting Fear
Written by: Maranda Russell

I took fear by the hand
and shook him until I heard
the sound of his yellow bones
popping in and out of place.

I pushed him down the stairs,
his skull cracking
against the white, stone steps
on his way to the finale.

He hit the basement floor,
his form a worthless gray lump,
emitting the mocking voices
no muzzle can silence.

Still, I must close the door
at least one more time
and pretend not to hear.
So I do.

Self doubt

Do any other authors out there struggle to believe that what you write is actually worth writing?  For the past few months I’ve been able to make a fairly successful living off of my copywriting and ghostwriting clients, plus I have had publishers show real interest in my creative writing, however, I still doubt every day that I will be able to write anything other than a page full of nonsense. 

It’s almost like I fear that talent is like an ancient muse who will simply show up and leave whenever he wants to.  I don’t trust myself to succeed.  Every day I take at least two assignments from clients, and with each one I doubt that I will be able to complete the work to their satisfaction.  This fear makes no sense, after all, I have never had a client reject my work or rate it poorly, and many of these clients are returning customers who have purposefully sought me out because they like my style.

Is doubt something that accompanies creativity?  Do artists and musicians experience the same kind of distrust?  I sincerely hope that I’m not alone.  I worry sometimes that I am just some neurotic soul with an inferiority complex.  Maybe the fact that I actually worry about being neurotic makes me even more so…