My husband and I went to Loveland, Ohio today to see a real castle built by hand by one guy (allegedly by a French knight, but that turns out to be more legend it seems). Here are a few of my favorite photos from the tour. First, the castle itself:
Me, trying to look regal sitting in the throne chair, but instead doing a good giraffe impression:
Me in black and white, dancing on the top of the turret:
The cute, soft little buddy I found:
We had fun, but now I’m worn out!
Yesterday was busy! In the morning, my husband and I went to a program at our local library put on my Wright Patterson Air Force Base about the history of UFOs and Project Blue Book (one of the programs that they had to investigate UFO reports). It was interesting, although obviously they didn’t share anything major about government secrets or possible cover-up programs.
The guy giving the speech did have a good sense of humor. I especially enjoyed this graphic he shared:
In the evening, we went to a local church for a meditation group. We did an hour of meditation called the “Twin Hearts” meditation which focused mostly on the heart and crown chakras. After that, we did some fun Tarot card readings just for kicks.
It was kind of funny, because I’ve studied the Tarot system and symbology, but my husband who has never done any card reading at all was called “more advanced” by the instructor. I will have to admit though that he surprised me with his perceptiveness and the things he saw and felt from the cards which I never would have thought of. He normally struggles to get out of his left brain thinking, but I guess maybe images help him to do so.
We used two separate decks, a dragon themed one and an archangels themed one. My favorite was the dragons!
Yesterday I saw my psychiatrist. We spent a lot of time talking about the dark, morbid interests I have and whether those might be contributing to my depression and anxiety. I’ve always been drawn to studying the dark side of things, whether it be the occult, serial killers, suicide, the dark side of history, horror movies and books, or psychopaths. I know these interests may not be the best things for my mental state, but they are all things that fascinate me and it is hard for me to resist things that fascinate me.
At one point in the conversation, my psychiatrist asked if there were any happy interests I have. I told him I love cartoons, but then I told him one of my favorite cartoon movies is Anastasia, which he pointed out is about the mass murder of the royal family lol, so maybe not so happy after all.
Today I have an MRI scheduled on my head and neck to try to figure out what might be causing my recent migraines. I’m really not looking forward to it. I hate MRI’s, especially on the head and neck because I feel really claustrophobic and hate not being able to move for so long.
If Edgar had a muse
to hassle and abuse,
why not I?
Enter those raven’s wings
and all terrible things
from finer days gone by.
Sometimes I feel like mental health disorders are like Pokemon: Gotta catch’em all!!!
Is there a point where collecting mental health labels gets ridiculous and almost humorous? Sometimes I wonder if all the stuff that has been ascribed to me is really wrong with me, and if it is – is it actually just one thing with many different facets?
Here are the mental health diagnoses I have collected to this day (that I know of and can remember):
PDD-NOS (high-functioning autism)
Asperger’s Syndrome (a slightly different form of high-functioning autism lol)
Bipolar Type 2
Major Depressive Disorder
Generalized Anxiety Disorder
Social Anxiety Disorder
Avoidant Personality Disorder
Complex PTSD
OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder)
Phobias
Cyclothymia
Adjustment Disorder
SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder)
Dysthymia
Somatic Disorder
Attachment Disorder
I may be leaving some out or have ones I don’t even know I have in my medical record, but am I getting close to winning this odd, mentally ill game of Pokemon Go yet? I CHOOSE YOU!…
Did a little shopping today at Hobby Lobby and Target. While looking at toys I saw these “Butt Heads” toys with literal butts for heads that reminded me so much of South Park. My favorite was the “Grim Ripper”:
I didn’t actually buy one, but I had to take a pic at least lol. I did have to buy myself a “Detective Pikachu” figure:
As you can see, I accomplished a lot today lol. I did get some decorative papers at Hobby Lobby that I hope to use soon to make some new artworks, so I’ll share those when I figure out what I’m doing with them.
I meant to share this poem around Easter, but forgot. Guess I had too much going on. This poem just sort of wrote itself, with the images of both the commercial and sacred aspects of the holiday mixing together in my mind. It is not meant to be offensive to religion, but instead, to compare and contrast the cheerful, innocent brightness of welcoming spring with the actual gruesome reality of a crucifixion and resurrection:
Scrambled Savior
Easter
pastel eggs
poor Jewish carpenter
whipped, beaten, and scrambled
last supper
omelet
Been super unmotivated and blah today. I wanted to write a post but didn’t want anything that would take too much brain power lol, so decided to list the things I DID manage to get done today as a way to give myself a little pat on the back for even trying!
Stuff I Got Done Today:
Over the weekend my husband and I visited Indianapolis to see the Star Trek exhibit at the Indianapolis Children’s Museum. My husband was in heaven lol. I was there. I did find a few fun things to concentrate on though.
I annoyed my husband by sitting in the captain’s chair like this:
My personal favorite in the exhibit was this painting of Data’s cat from The Next Generation, I would hang this in my house:
My husband got assimilated and beamed up (along with a little friend):
I did get to ride the museum’s carousel (one of my favorite things to do at any museum, zoo, or park). Unfortunately, I threw my hip out climbing onto it. I think from now on I may need to sit on the little benches on the carousel like all the other old, broken down bodies:
I also got a photo op at Candyland:
Now I am back home, exhausted, sore, and will probably need a few days to recuperate.
