Tag: hurt

  • My World Has Crashed

    I’m normally brutally honest with you guys, but sometimes that is hard when someone else’s privacy and reputation is involved, but I am deeply hurting today and must share that much at least. I feel like my entire world has been turned upside down in less than a day’s worth of time. I found out […]

  • My Baby is Dying

    My baby kitty Spyder is dying. I’m pretty sure of it now. We’ve ruled out pretty much everything but cancer or autoimmune disease, with cancer looking most likely. He hasn’t eaten for 3 days now and is getting weaker and weaker. We’ve tried everything we know. Spent well over $1,000 to try to get him […]

  • Complicated Mother’s Day

    Mother’s Day always creates such a barrage of mixed emotions for me. There was a lot of trauma, abuse, mental illness, and foolish decisions that marked my childhood. My mother was far from a perfect parent. Luckily, she does admit to that and seems to be really trying to be a better person now, but […]

  • When Friends Say Cruel Things It Sticks With You

    It is strange how negative words can stay with us for a lifetime and hurt long after they are spoken. Today, I was reminded of a conversation I had way back in middle school. My friends and I were having a conversation about birth order statistics and how the oldest is often the smartest and […]

  • Poetry – At Your Service

    At Your Service By: Maranda Russell One more lost little girl at your service. Actually, that’s a lie. I’m not at your service. I’m not at your anything – and I never shall be again.

  • Feeling Low After Lawyer Visit

    Today has been a rough day 😦 I had to get up early to go to an appointment with my lawyer to talk about my upcoming SSDI hearing in February. I woke up feeling exhausted, achy, and sick to begin with, my stomach and digestive system freaking out from the anxiety of the change in […]

  • Can Abusers Ever Be Reformed?

    This is a question I struggle with myself on a regular basis. Can abusers really ever change or is it just theater to try to pull you back in so they can mistreat you again? Should you ever let a prior abuser back into your life if they seem to have changed for the good? […]

  • YA Book Review: “Without Tess” by Marcella Pixley

    “Without Tess”, written by Marcella Pixley, is one of the best YA novels I have read in a while. I rarely give books five stars when rating them, but this one I did. The story revolves around the main character (Lizzie), and her dead sister (Tess). Lizzie is the younger sister by a couple years […]

  • Poetry – Cook Me With Tenderness

    Cook Me With Tenderness By: Maranda Russell Clever, and not yet without tricks, I seem to only disappoint you further. But I beg of you, don’t roast me – just smash me to bits and cook me with tenderness.

  • Thoughts on Growing Up With Autism

    This post will contain a collection of short journal entries I wrote recently about what it was like emotionally to grow up with autism. These thoughts specifically dealt with bullying and (for me) the most confusing time of adolescence, which was middle school and the beginning of high school. By the last couple years of […]