Tag: satire

  • Short monologue – Time traveler

    Why am I leaving? No, I’m not traveling back in time to stop Hitler. Nope, not Mao either. Yeah, that whole holocaust thing was a disaster, but that’s not my assignment. Nope, I’m not allowed to save JFK or MLK, even if I’d love to meet those two. Yes, stopping slavery earlier would be noble, […]

  • Prose Poetry – Houseplants

    I murder houseplants. Not intentionally, mind you, but the result is still the same…dead flowers, dead leaves, dead roots. I’m pretty sure I’ve even killed the dirt (if that’s possible). Regardless, for some unintelligible reason, people keep gifting the little pots of green hope to me. I swear, sometimes I’m convinced I can hear their […]

  • Poetry – Sell Your Soul?

    Everywhere I go I hear warnings about the dangers of selling your soul, but here I am pouring mine out day after day and I can’t even GIVE it away!

  • Poetry – Beset by Satan

    Daily, I am beset by Satan in all his diverse forms – but the most persistent of all is the government.

  • Trump Thinks I’m a Fan…

    I got an email today from Trump, thanking me for all my support and for being a part of “Trump Nation”…um, I can’t stand you dude. Where does he get his information from? Does he just buy email lists and then pretend that you already support him, thinking that will somehow guarantee your support in […]

  • I Wrote a Letter to the Air Force about Aliens…

    Last night I was talking to someone online when my memory was sparked about an amusing email letter I sent years ago to Wright Patterson Air Force Base, located here in Dayton. The letter was semi-serious and semi-trolling I suppose. I wanted it to be ridiculously humorous and maybe make the office staff who ended […]

  • Poetry – Tip Her

    (The following slightly risque poem was inspired by a passage from Ulysses by James Joyce, which turned out to be a lot dirtier (and nonsensical) than I thought it would be lol.) Stop. Knocking. Silly man! Want women by the score? Quit throwing flowers at their feet and singing sappy songs outside in your feathered […]

  • Poetry – Beauty and the Beast

    I already told this story but if you insist, here it is again condensed into one word – bestiality.

  • Poetry – Pride and Prejudice Rewrite

    We are all well. Imagine our surprise, when our poor mother was sent off with bad news, and never came back for the truth… (“rewritten” using bits and pieces of prose from the novel itself)

  • At Least I Accomplished Something…

    Been super unmotivated and blah today. I wanted to write a post but didn’t want anything that would take too much brain power lol, so decided to list the things I DID manage to get done today as a way to give myself a little pat on the back for even trying! Stuff I Got […]